1. Today, I received my passport in the mail. They got my birthdate wrong. Then I picked up my birth certificate that I had sent in with the application. Turns out my parents have been celebrating my birthday on the wrong day for 16 years. FML
2. Today, I wanted to have a good lunch with my wife before fasting for my surgery which I may not survive, she decided getting her hair cut was more important. I ate alone. FML
3. Today, I saw an elderly man fall in a crosswalk, so I jumped off my bike to help. As I helped him across, the light turned green. At that point I noticed my phone had fallen out of my pocket in the street and was run over by several cars. I then watched across a 6 lane street as someone stole my bike. FML
4. Today I noticed that my daughter was making funny noises which oddly resembled the sounds my wife makes in bed. When I asked her what she was doing she said "I'm pretending to be mommy from last night." I was on a business trip last night. FML
5. Today, I bit my boyfriend's neck. I felt something squirt into my mouth. Turns out I had just popped
a pimple on his neck into my mouth. FML
6. Today, I texted my college boyfriend to tell him how terrible I felt about cheating. He replied saying he was so relieved because he had been cheating on me with a girl in his dorm. I was talking about my math exam. FML
7. Today, it's my 18th birthday. My parents got me a $5 gift certificate to Itunes. It came for free with the iPhone they just bought my sister for her middle school graduation. FML
8. Today, I handed my PhD dissertation, which I have spent the past year researching and writing full-time. Last night, my roommate set an autocorrect on Word that changed "neither" to "nigger." I didn't notice until after I handed it in. My professor is black. FML
9. Today, at the dentist, I was getting my teeth cleaned. Looking up at his nose, I saw runny snot dripping onto his lip. I tried to slowly move away. He told me "Stop!" The movement of his lips caused the snot to fall right into my mouth. FML
10. Today, my friend had to take my cat who has a tumor to be put down when I wasn't home since I couldn't bare to take him myself. I have two cats. He took the wrong one. FML
I JUMPED AT THE LAST PART... :(
ReplyDeleteAWESOME LMAO
ReplyDeleteaww the last one.. poor cat D:
ReplyDeleteAwww , poor cat and shame on the nieghbour .
ReplyDeletefunniest for me is the 8th .
not bad >.<
ReplyDeletenumber 9 makes me shiver.
ReplyDelete5 & 9 made me regret ever reading these
ReplyDeletebut omg their so funny!
number 6 is so jokes!
ReplyDeletefunnayy yoo!! xD might put some of these as my 'status' on facebook xD
ReplyDeletehilarious love the last one. dumbass neighbor
ReplyDeletenumber 6 is such a load of shit.
ReplyDeletei lovee 'em all except 5 & 9 !
ReplyDeleted1zzzz iii5 4Ws0mmmm3333 iz di5 tr0uu. q0zzt b4kkccc ple34553
ReplyDelete----w4rzi0o
I've read all of these before :( They're not the best.
ReplyDeletegirl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty and he said no. She
ReplyDeleteasked him if he would want to be with her forever and he said no. She
then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, and once again he
replied with a no. She had heard enough. As she walked away,tears
streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and ...said... ... ... See ... See MoreMoreSee... See... See more... See More... See More ... See MoreMore... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See more... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More
MoreSee... See More
... See MoreMore... ... See MoreSee More.... You're not pretty you're
beautiful. I don'twant to be with you forever. I NEED to be with you
forever. And I wouldn't cry if you walked away...I'd die... ♥♥ ~~THE
END~~♥♥.......Isn't that sweet? Tonight at midnight your true love
will realize they like you. Something good will happen to you at
1:00-4:00pm tomorrow, it could be anywhere on IM or email, outside of
school,anywhere! Get ready for the biggest shock of your life. If you
break this chain letter you will be cursed with 10 relationship
problemsforthe next ten years. If you post this to 15 pages in 15
omg the poor cat!
ReplyDeleteLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! XD
ReplyDeletebut OWCH!!! at some!!!!!!!!!!!! ><'
nd gutteeeddddd at others..... =\
there not real people made them up :D nice ones at least i hope there not real
ReplyDeleteAhahaha They Are Hilarious !!!!!!!!x
ReplyDeletegirl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty and he said no. She
ReplyDeleteasked him if he would want to be with her forever and he said no. She
then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, and once again he
replied with a no. She had heard enough. As she walked away,tears
streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and ...said... ... ... See ... See MoreMoreSee... See... See more... See More... See More ... See MoreMore... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See more... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More
MoreSee... See More
... See MoreMore... ... See MoreSee More.... You're not pretty you're
beautiful. I don'twant to be with you forever. I NEED to be with you
forever. And I wouldn't cry if you walked away...I'd die... ♥♥ ~~THE
END~~♥♥.......Isn't that sweet? Tonight at midnight your true love
will realize they like you. Something good will happen to you at
1:00-4:00pm tomorrow, it could be anywhere on IM or email, outside of
school,anywhere! Get ready for the biggest shock of your life. If you
break this chain letter you will be cursed with 10 relationship
problemsforthe next ten years. If you post this to 15 pages in 15
girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty and he said no. She
ReplyDeleteasked him if he would want to be with her forever and he said no. She
then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, and once again he
replied with a no. She had heard enough. As she walked away,tears
streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and ...said... ... ... See ... See MoreMoreSee... See... See more... See More... See More ... See MoreMore... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See more... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More
MoreSee... See More
... See MoreMore... ... See MoreSee More.... You're not pretty you're
beautiful. I don'twant to be with you forever. I NEED to be with you
forever. And I wouldn't cry if you walked away...I'd die... ♥♥ ~~THE
END~~♥♥.......Isn't that sweet? Tonight at midnight your true love
will realize they like you. Something good will happen to you at
1:00-4:00pm tomorrow, it could be anywhere on IM or email, outside of
school,anywhere! Get ready for the biggest shock of your life. If you
break this chain letter you will be cursed with 10 relationship
problemsforthe next ten years. If you post this to 15 pages in 15
girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty and he said no. She
ReplyDeleteasked him if he would want to be with her forever and he said no. She
then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, and once again he
replied with a no. She had heard enough. As she walked away,tears
streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and ...said... ... ... See ... See MoreMoreSee... See... See more... See More... See More ... See MoreMore... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See more... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More
MoreSee... See More
... See MoreMore... ... See MoreSee More.... You're not pretty you're
beautiful. I don'twant to be with you forever. I NEED to be with you
forever. And I wouldn't cry if you walked away...I'd die... ♥♥ ~~THE
END~~♥♥.......Isn't that sweet? Tonight at midnight your true love
will realize they like you. Something good will happen to you at
1:00-4:00pm tomorrow, it could be anywhere on IM or email, outside of
school,anywhere! Get ready for the biggest shock of your life. If you
break this chain letter you will be cursed with 10 relationship
problemsforthe next ten years. If you post this to 15 pages in 15
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww pooorr pooorrr cat :'( :'( <3 xxx
ReplyDelete1.2. 4. 7. lmaoooooooooooo
ReplyDeletegirl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty and he said no. She
ReplyDeleteasked him if he would want to be with her forever and he said no. She
then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, and once again he
replied with a no. She had heard enough. As she walked away,tears
streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and ...said... ... ... See ... See MoreMoreSee... See... See more... See More... See More ... See MoreMore... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See more... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More
MoreSee... See More
... See MoreMore... ... See MoreSee More.... You're not pretty you're
beautiful. I don'twant to be with you forever. I NEED to be with you
forever. And I wouldn't cry if you walked away...I'd die... ♥♥ ~~THE
END~~♥♥.......Isn't that sweet? Tonight at midnight your true love
will realize they like you. Something good will happen to you at
1:00-4:00pm tomorrow, it could be anywhere on IM or email, outside of
school,anywhere! Get ready for the biggest shock of your life. If you
break this chain letter you will be cursed with 10 relationship
problemsforthe next ten years. If you post this to 15 pages in 15
HHAHAHAHAHA thats fucking AWESOME MATE!!!!
ReplyDeleteclick on mine and ill click on yours ;]
ReplyDeletewww.paybacktimelizzy.net/index.php?c=viral&m=index&id=dc55cd7be9b6bc2cd5a120903cd0c556
What does FML mean??
ReplyDeleteFML MEANS FUCK MY LIFE...lol and i jumped on number 9 lol
ReplyDeletegirl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty and he said no. She
ReplyDeleteasked him if he would want to be with her forever and he said no. She
then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, and once again he
replied with a no. She had heard enough. As she walked away,tears
streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and ...said... ... ... See ... See MoreMoreSee... See... See more... See More... See More ... See MoreMore... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See more... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More
MoreSee... See More
... See MoreMore... ... See MoreSee More.... You're not pretty you're
beautiful. I don'twant to be with you forever. I NEED to be with you
forever. And I wouldn't cry if you walked away...I'd die... ♥♥ ~~THE
END~~♥♥.......Isn't that sweet? Tonight at midnight your true love
will realize they like you. Something good will happen to you at
1:00-4:00pm tomorrow, it could be anywhere on IM or email, outside of
school,anywhere! Get ready for the biggest shock of your life. If you
break this chain letter you will be cursed with 10 relationship
problemsforthe next ten years. If you post this to 15 pages in 15
omg number 5 and number 9 both EEEEEEEWWWWW
ReplyDeleteAHAHHA OMG NUMBER 4 JUST MADE MY DAYY <3
ReplyDelete#2 is nowhere near funny
ReplyDelete#2 made me feel sad :(
ReplyDeleteHaha #4 is hilarious though im sorry for the dad.
ReplyDelete#6,
ReplyDeleteftw
hahahahahaha
:D
#5 LMFAO
ReplyDeletethe cat one is so sad
ReplyDeleteeeeeew gross pimple and snot.. aha my professor is black.. and he took the wrong one and .. i was talking about my math test aha
ReplyDeletehahahaha
ReplyDeletegirl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty and he said no. She
ReplyDeleteasked him if he would want to be with her forever and he said no. She
then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, and once again he
replied with a no. She had heard enough. As she walked away,tears
streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and ...said... ... ... See ... See MoreMoreSee... See... See more... See More... See More ... See MoreMore... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See more... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More... See More
MoreSee... See More
... See MoreMore... ... See MoreSee More.... You're not pretty you're
beautiful. I don'twant to be with you forever. I NEED to be with you
forever. And I wouldn't cry if you walked away...I'd die... ♥♥ ~~THE
END~~♥♥.......Isn't that sweet? Tonight at midnight your true love
will realize they like you. Something good will happen to you at
1:00-4:00pm tomorrow, it could be anywhere on IM or email, outside of
school,anywhere! Get ready for the biggest shock of your life. If you
break this chain letter you will be cursed with 10 relationship
problemsforthe next ten years. If you post this to 15 pages in 15
No. 9 has to be fake. Dentists have to wear those protective mouth and nose mask things.
ReplyDeleteNumber 2 is soo sad :'(
ReplyDelete^^my dentist never wears those things
ReplyDelete8 and 10 lol
ReplyDelete3 is the best.
ReplyDeletewowwwww
ReplyDeleteahhhh, number six sucks eggssss
ReplyDeletelol funny stuff
ReplyDeleteOMG LOL 4 is so funny! HAHAHA
ReplyDeletenumberr 5 is eeeuuuuuwwwwwwww
ReplyDelete